Frank Gannucci
03-28-2008, 09:02 PM
"$99,000 Answer":
Alice: "Spell antidistanttablihmentterrism (sp?)."
Ralph: "I'll spell it...I'll spell it...I'll spell it."
Alice: "Well, go ahead."
Ralph: "I will spell it when you give me $16,000."
"Two For The Money":
Ralph: "How many holdups have I had?"
Alice: "Six."
Ralph: "In five of them, they didn't get anything."
Alice: "The sixth time was a doozy. They took $45 and the bus."
Ralph: "I have been driving a bus for 15 years and because I lose ONE bus, you have to hold it over my head."
"Ralph Kramden Presents":
Ralph: "You know what Jackie Gleason gets. Maybe $50 to $100 a night."
Ed: "$50 to $100 a night?"
Ralph: "Yeah. Personally, I don't think he deserves it but that is what he gets."
"Sleepy Time Gal":
Ralph (to Alice): "By the way cupcake..."
Ed: "Yes Ralph."
Ralph: "She is cupcake. You're fruitcake."
"On Stage":
Ralph: "That shows how much you know about show business. You're always talking about something you don't know anything about. Just remember this: Gregory Peck was an usher at the Music Hall, you know, when they found him, and Kurt Douglas was a soda jerk. So, there's a chance for me."
Alice: "Sure, you can become an usher at the Music Hall or a soda jerk!"
"The Prowler":
Ed: "I came by to tell you to put some stuff up against the door."
Ralph: "Thank you but I have already done that."
Ed: "How did I get in?"
"Two Men On A Horse Part 1":
Alice: "I'll go get a flashlight for you."
Ralph: "I don't need one."
(Ralph leaves and falls down the stairs. Alice comes by the door. He comes back.)
Ralph: "Well, don't just stand there. Get me a flashlight."
"Letter To The Boss":
(Ralph thinks that he has been fired. He lists all the jobs that are listed in the paper.)
Alice: "What is wrong with those jobs?"
Ralph: "Nothing except they are listed under: 'Help Wanted: Women!'"
"Young At Heart":
Alice: "I want to do the things that young people do. That is what makes you young."
Ralph: "You want to do that? Let's play games that young people play. Let's play house. I will be the daddy and you will be the mommy. All right Mommy CLEAN UP!"
Alice: "Spell antidistanttablihmentterrism (sp?)."
Ralph: "I'll spell it...I'll spell it...I'll spell it."
Alice: "Well, go ahead."
Ralph: "I will spell it when you give me $16,000."
"Two For The Money":
Ralph: "How many holdups have I had?"
Alice: "Six."
Ralph: "In five of them, they didn't get anything."
Alice: "The sixth time was a doozy. They took $45 and the bus."
Ralph: "I have been driving a bus for 15 years and because I lose ONE bus, you have to hold it over my head."
"Ralph Kramden Presents":
Ralph: "You know what Jackie Gleason gets. Maybe $50 to $100 a night."
Ed: "$50 to $100 a night?"
Ralph: "Yeah. Personally, I don't think he deserves it but that is what he gets."
"Sleepy Time Gal":
Ralph (to Alice): "By the way cupcake..."
Ed: "Yes Ralph."
Ralph: "She is cupcake. You're fruitcake."
"On Stage":
Ralph: "That shows how much you know about show business. You're always talking about something you don't know anything about. Just remember this: Gregory Peck was an usher at the Music Hall, you know, when they found him, and Kurt Douglas was a soda jerk. So, there's a chance for me."
Alice: "Sure, you can become an usher at the Music Hall or a soda jerk!"
"The Prowler":
Ed: "I came by to tell you to put some stuff up against the door."
Ralph: "Thank you but I have already done that."
Ed: "How did I get in?"
"Two Men On A Horse Part 1":
Alice: "I'll go get a flashlight for you."
Ralph: "I don't need one."
(Ralph leaves and falls down the stairs. Alice comes by the door. He comes back.)
Ralph: "Well, don't just stand there. Get me a flashlight."
"Letter To The Boss":
(Ralph thinks that he has been fired. He lists all the jobs that are listed in the paper.)
Alice: "What is wrong with those jobs?"
Ralph: "Nothing except they are listed under: 'Help Wanted: Women!'"
"Young At Heart":
Alice: "I want to do the things that young people do. That is what makes you young."
Ralph: "You want to do that? Let's play games that young people play. Let's play house. I will be the daddy and you will be the mommy. All right Mommy CLEAN UP!"