Frank Gannucci
03-05-2008, 12:29 PM
"Funny Money":
Ralph: "Uh, who should I call Norton?"
Ed: "Why don't you try the fire escape? Maybe someone is out there."
"Ralph Kramden Inc.":
Alice: "I burned my finger on that darn stove."
Ralph: "Gee, that's terrible. If you are not burning yourself, it's my food."
"Hot Dog Stand":
Ralph: "Why did you have to wear that tie?"
Ed: "What is wrong with it?"
Ralph: "Look at the stain on it."
Ed: "That is all right. It's pot roast."
"Hot Dog Stand":
Alice: "You call a bowling ball an absolute neccessity?"
Ralph: "I certainly do. You can't bowl without one."
"Sees All, Knows All":
Ed: "I know a man that had his palm read. The fortune teller said that he would die in six months."
Ralph: "What happened?"
Ed: "He died in four months."
"Flushing Ho":
(The Kramdens bought a duplex and has the Nortons as tenants because
the landlord didn't fix anything. Ralph is refusing to fix things in Ed's apartment.)
Ralph: "When we were tenants in the other place, the landlord wouldn't fix anything over there. Did he?"
Ed: "I know, that's why we moved in here. Remember?"
"Quiz Show":
Ed: "I was on a quiz show once. I was so nervous that I couldn't answer the first question that they gave me."
Ralph: "What was that?"
Ed: "My name."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
(Ralph and Ed try to lift the dresser.)
Ralph: "I'll count to three and on three we lift and then we heave ho. One..two...three."
(Ralph lifts the dresser but he can't lift his side of the dresser.)
Ralph (yells): "ARRRRRRGGGGH!" (normal voice): "Why didn't you lift?"
Ed: "We didn't heave ho."
"Cottage For Sale Part 1":
Alice: "You got rocks in your head."
Ralph: "I got rocks in my head? I got rocks in my head? I got nothing in my head."
Ralph: "Uh, who should I call Norton?"
Ed: "Why don't you try the fire escape? Maybe someone is out there."
"Ralph Kramden Inc.":
Alice: "I burned my finger on that darn stove."
Ralph: "Gee, that's terrible. If you are not burning yourself, it's my food."
"Hot Dog Stand":
Ralph: "Why did you have to wear that tie?"
Ed: "What is wrong with it?"
Ralph: "Look at the stain on it."
Ed: "That is all right. It's pot roast."
"Hot Dog Stand":
Alice: "You call a bowling ball an absolute neccessity?"
Ralph: "I certainly do. You can't bowl without one."
"Sees All, Knows All":
Ed: "I know a man that had his palm read. The fortune teller said that he would die in six months."
Ralph: "What happened?"
Ed: "He died in four months."
"Flushing Ho":
(The Kramdens bought a duplex and has the Nortons as tenants because
the landlord didn't fix anything. Ralph is refusing to fix things in Ed's apartment.)
Ralph: "When we were tenants in the other place, the landlord wouldn't fix anything over there. Did he?"
Ed: "I know, that's why we moved in here. Remember?"
"Quiz Show":
Ed: "I was on a quiz show once. I was so nervous that I couldn't answer the first question that they gave me."
Ralph: "What was that?"
Ed: "My name."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
(Ralph and Ed try to lift the dresser.)
Ralph: "I'll count to three and on three we lift and then we heave ho. One..two...three."
(Ralph lifts the dresser but he can't lift his side of the dresser.)
Ralph (yells): "ARRRRRRGGGGH!" (normal voice): "Why didn't you lift?"
Ed: "We didn't heave ho."
"Cottage For Sale Part 1":
Alice: "You got rocks in your head."
Ralph: "I got rocks in my head? I got rocks in my head? I got nothing in my head."