Ireneparalegal
12-02-2007, 07:47 PM
Found this while doing some searching. :lol: :lol: So true...enjoy:
It is impossible for two colleages of the opposite sex to have a completely proffessional relationship.
If you decide to launch into song there will always be backing music available.
If the movie is set in America any Australians will talk with a British accent.
Women of action can run, do karate, kickbox, climb ladders and perform highly acrobatic movements while wearing six inch heals and either a miniskirt or a tight leather cat suit.
If a person has an occupation that involves spending most of their working hours at weddings, their love life will be a disaster or non-existent.
If you´re getting kicked into the face, there´s no real problem with that. Regardless how hard you´ve been kicked, you will stay unconcious for the maximum of five minutes. Then, after saying "Ouch!", you´ll be able to get on your feet again and rescue the world. You don´t have broken cheek bones or jaw fractures, of course. And there´s not even the slightest hematoma to be seen.
If some old wino witnesses some sort of unbelievable event (aliens landing, Monsters eating people...), there are two possibilities. He either looks at the paper-wrapped bottle with a view of disgust, throws it away and starts a new life or he takes a deep breath and then slowly walks the other direction.
Radiation - despite of its amount - almost instantly results in burn wounds or big ugly abscesses with yellow fluid leakings. Oh yes, this is only for bad guys. Good guys will never suffer from radiation instantly. And the hero, of course, will not suffer from radiation at all.
When a girl is in a house all by herself in a horror movie, it is always raining or thunder and lightning outside.
In all junior highs, the popular girls have big boobs, while the geeky girls are flat-chested.
In movies when a character is brushing his/her teeth, they never get toothpaste on their mouth or rinse out their toothbrush when through cleaning their teeth.
The murderers in horror movies always have to be some nerd seeking revenge on the popular kids.
In scary movies, some girl ALWAYS has to trip while running away from the murderer despite how flat the ground may be.
It is impossible for two colleages of the opposite sex to have a completely proffessional relationship.
If you decide to launch into song there will always be backing music available.
If the movie is set in America any Australians will talk with a British accent.
Women of action can run, do karate, kickbox, climb ladders and perform highly acrobatic movements while wearing six inch heals and either a miniskirt or a tight leather cat suit.
If a person has an occupation that involves spending most of their working hours at weddings, their love life will be a disaster or non-existent.
If you´re getting kicked into the face, there´s no real problem with that. Regardless how hard you´ve been kicked, you will stay unconcious for the maximum of five minutes. Then, after saying "Ouch!", you´ll be able to get on your feet again and rescue the world. You don´t have broken cheek bones or jaw fractures, of course. And there´s not even the slightest hematoma to be seen.
If some old wino witnesses some sort of unbelievable event (aliens landing, Monsters eating people...), there are two possibilities. He either looks at the paper-wrapped bottle with a view of disgust, throws it away and starts a new life or he takes a deep breath and then slowly walks the other direction.
Radiation - despite of its amount - almost instantly results in burn wounds or big ugly abscesses with yellow fluid leakings. Oh yes, this is only for bad guys. Good guys will never suffer from radiation instantly. And the hero, of course, will not suffer from radiation at all.
When a girl is in a house all by herself in a horror movie, it is always raining or thunder and lightning outside.
In all junior highs, the popular girls have big boobs, while the geeky girls are flat-chested.
In movies when a character is brushing his/her teeth, they never get toothpaste on their mouth or rinse out their toothbrush when through cleaning their teeth.
The murderers in horror movies always have to be some nerd seeking revenge on the popular kids.
In scary movies, some girl ALWAYS has to trip while running away from the murderer despite how flat the ground may be.