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Frank Gannucci
11-25-2007, 08:30 AM
"Ralph Kramden, Hero At Large":

(The crooks are in the apartment. Ralph picks up a water pistol.)

Ralph (yells): "ALL RIGHT! STICK 'EM UP! GET 'EM UP!"

(The crooks get their arms up. Knock on door.)

Ralph (yells): "WHO IS IT?"

Tommy (from outside): "It's me Tommy. Do you have my water pistol in there?"

"Safety Award":

Ed: "Can I wear this hankerchef?"

Ralph: "It's one of my new ones. Remember, it's for showing, not blowing."

"Boys & Girls Together":

Alice (hugging Ralph): "Maye it's better with the lights on so that way I can see my big handsome man."

(Alice kisses Ralph.)

Ralph: "Have you been at that beer?"

"Stars Over Flatbush":

Ed (reading an astrology book): "Taurus the Bull shows wisodm in all money manners and is attractive to the opposite sex."

Ralph: "That's me all right."

"Two Men On A Horse":

Ed: "We Racoons do a lot of things for this communitty."

Alice: "Name one."

Ed: "Last year, we planted a bush in the park."

"King of The Castle":

(Trixie kicked Ed out.)

Ralph: "I don't know what went wrong. I told you to say to her that you are the king of your castle."

Ed: "I knew my part. Trixie didn't know hers."

"You're In The Picture":

(The man is holding a picture of Ralph and a girl kissing. If Alice found out, she would get mad.)

Man: "You give me $500 so you can have this picture or I will give it to your wife."

Ed: "Don't take the money. Let Alice have the picture than you can get it from her for nothing."

"Out of Sight, Out of Mind":

Ralph: "Can you take a hint?"

Ed: "Yes."

Ralph: "All right." (yells): "I HATE YOU! HATE YOU! HATE YOU! NOW GET OUT!"

Ed: "Okay. What's the hint?"

"Ralph Kramden, Hero At Large" (aka "Trapped"):

Ralph: "You are the only man that can turn my stomach upside-down."

Ed: "There isn't a man in this city that is strong enough to do that."