Frank Gannucci
06-11-2007, 03:04 PM
"Dial J For Janitor":
Ralph: "Why should I cut out bowling? It's my only relaxation. Besides, the exercise is good for me to keep down my weight."
Alice: "You don't need anything to hold your weight down. You need something to hold it up."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
(Ralph picks up the burnt jacket.)
Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke, Norton?"
Ed: "No, that is my idea of a burn."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
Ralph: "We will lift up the dresser on the count of three and then we will heave-ho. 1...2...3...."
(Ralph lifts it up but he can't.)
Ralph (yells): "OW! WHY DIDN'T YOU LIFT?"
Ed: "We didn't heave-ho."
"Finders Keepers":
(Ralph is playing pinball.)
Ed: "You can still come up empty, you know."
Ralph: "The only thing empty around here is your head."
"Expectant Dad":
Ed: "The whole sewer was swarming with FBI men."
Trixie: "What were they doing in the sewer?"
Ed: "They were looking for wetbacks who were trying to beat the cross-town traffic."
"Teamwork Beats The Clock":
Ralph: "As usual, I am carryng the whole load on my shoulders."
Alice: "You are carrying the load all right, but it's not on your shoulders."
"In 25 Words Or Less":
(The waiter makes crepe zuzzets [Franch pancakes], he starts a fire on his grill. Ralph sees it and puts the fire out with a fire extinguisher.)
Ralph: "It's a good thing I was here or the whole boat would have been on fire."
Alice: "Ralph, those were French pancakes."
Ralph: "I don't care what started the fire."
"In 25 Words Or Less":
Ralph: "Flakey Wakey's add to the taste..."
Ed: "But take away from your fat little waist."
"Ship Of Fools":
Ed: "I went to Europe once."
Man: "Did you enjoy it?"
Ed: "No, the Germans kept shooting at me."
Ralph: "Why should I cut out bowling? It's my only relaxation. Besides, the exercise is good for me to keep down my weight."
Alice: "You don't need anything to hold your weight down. You need something to hold it up."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
(Ralph picks up the burnt jacket.)
Ralph: "Is this your idea of a joke, Norton?"
Ed: "No, that is my idea of a burn."
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":
Ralph: "We will lift up the dresser on the count of three and then we will heave-ho. 1...2...3...."
(Ralph lifts it up but he can't.)
Ralph (yells): "OW! WHY DIDN'T YOU LIFT?"
Ed: "We didn't heave-ho."
"Finders Keepers":
(Ralph is playing pinball.)
Ed: "You can still come up empty, you know."
Ralph: "The only thing empty around here is your head."
"Expectant Dad":
Ed: "The whole sewer was swarming with FBI men."
Trixie: "What were they doing in the sewer?"
Ed: "They were looking for wetbacks who were trying to beat the cross-town traffic."
"Teamwork Beats The Clock":
Ralph: "As usual, I am carryng the whole load on my shoulders."
Alice: "You are carrying the load all right, but it's not on your shoulders."
"In 25 Words Or Less":
(The waiter makes crepe zuzzets [Franch pancakes], he starts a fire on his grill. Ralph sees it and puts the fire out with a fire extinguisher.)
Ralph: "It's a good thing I was here or the whole boat would have been on fire."
Alice: "Ralph, those were French pancakes."
Ralph: "I don't care what started the fire."
"In 25 Words Or Less":
Ralph: "Flakey Wakey's add to the taste..."
Ed: "But take away from your fat little waist."
"Ship Of Fools":
Ed: "I went to Europe once."
Man: "Did you enjoy it?"
Ed: "No, the Germans kept shooting at me."