C Doody
11-19-2004, 03:14 PM
CAST
Adam Collins - Chad Doody
Brad Fulton - TF
Jeff Kimble - EFD
Kim Stevens - Brooke Anne Smith
Walter Munson - William Daniels
GUEST STARS
Michael Collins - Timothy Daly
Julia Collins - Erin Moran
Matt Collins - Jake Thomas
Carlos Fulton - Carlos Lacamara
Maria Fulton - Constance Marie
Bob Kimble - Blake Clark
Mary Kimble - Crystal Bernard
Patrick Kimble - Erik Von Detton
Frank Stevens - Dan Lauria
_____________________________________________________________________________________
*Adam, Kim & Jeff are shown sitting as Brad walks up.*
Brad: Ok guys, The arrangements have been made. All of our familys should be arriving the day after tommorow.
Jeff: I Gotta Admit, Adam....That was a great idea to invite all of our familys here for Thanksgiving.
Adam: Yeah, I Just figured....Why should we all have to go through the trouble of going back home....Make them come here.
Kim: Adam....Your Parents live like 10 miles away.
Adam: Yeah But Thats Like....A Million millograms in Canadian.
Brad: Milograms?...
Kim: Well my Father lives all the way in Kansas, So This is gonna be nice. I Havent even seen him since i moved here.
Brad: I'm still not so sure about all this, Myself.
Jeff: Whys That?
Brad: My Parents are rich...They're used to having fancy dinners on Thanksgiving that are made by caterers. I'm afraid they're gonna be extremely unimpressed by me living in a tiny apartment with 3 other people.
Adam: Dont worry, Brad. Once they meet us, I'm sure they'll LOVE Your living arrangements. I Dont wanna brag, But i make a PRETTY Good Impression on people.
Brad: Oh God......I GOTTA GO CALL THEM AND TELL THEM NOT TO COME.
*Brad runs off as Adam Looks confused*
(Themesong: "Different People" By No Doubt)
*Kim is shown in the kitchen when Brad Walks in with a bag of grocerys*
Brad: I Got the food. Cranberry Sauce, Dinner rolls, And about 5 pounds of stuffing.
Kim: 5 Pounds? We have alot of people coming, But i dont think we need THAT Much.
Brad: I Enjoy Stuffing.
Kim: But...
Brad: I REALLY Enjoy Stuffing...
Kim: O...K.
*Adam walks in.*
Adam: Hey Guys I...*Looks at Grocery Bag* STUFFING!
Brad: You Bet your life its stuffing, Fella!
Adam: Stuffing RULES!
Brad: The Only thing better than stuffing...Is Girls.
Adam: Dude, What about girls That bring you stuffing and cook it for you?
Brad: Now thats just heaven.
Kim: GUYS....ENOUGH ABOUT STUFFING!
Adam: *Shocked* But.....Its Stuffing.
*Jeff walks In.*
Jeff: Ohhh Stuffing...
Kim: SHUT UP!
Jeff: .....*Looks at Adam* Whats her problem?
Adam: Shes A Stuffing Hater.
Kim: I Am NOT A Stuffing hater.....I'm just tired of hearing about stuffing. Now since you're all here, I Wanted to give you your assignments.
Adam: No Way, Kim...School is OUT For Thanksgiving time...I Refuse to work in any way And theres no way you can make me.
Kim: *Sad Face* Please...
Adam: *Smiles Like An Idiot* Ok!
Kim: Brad, I Need you to make the pie.
Brad: Uhhh....I've never done that before. We had Servants for that back home.
Kim: Its easy, Brad. Just follow the recipe in my cookbook. Jeff....I Need you to tidy up the house before our families get here.
Jeff: Thats what i do best....But i gotta warn ya, My family will make sure it doesnt stay clean for long. Buncha slobs........On second thought, Do they REALLY Have to come here?
Kim: Yes, Now clean up. Adam, I Need you to...
Adam: Give you a backrub?
Kim: No...
Adam: Let you give me a backrub?
Kim: No...
Adam: *Shocked* Dont tell me you want me to be a part of your sick spawning Ritual so that we can engage in meaningless love making for the sole reason of allowing you to have children before tossing me away like an old magazine?
Kim: N...
Adam: Cause I'd be fine with that.
Kim:.......No, I Just want you to defrost the turkey. That is your ONE Job...It is fairly easy.
Adam: Oh.....Ok.
Kim: Now lets get to it, Tommorows Thanksgiving!
*Adam, Brad & Jeff walk away as Kim smiles.*
Kim: Nothing can go wrong!
*The next day Kim is shown walking into the living room and sees Adam sleeping on the couch covered in potato chip crumbs with the TV On.*
Kim: ADAM!
Adam: *Wakes Up* Whaa...Whats the matter?
Kim: Our parents are arriving in about an hour! Why did you sleep on the couch anyway?
Adam: Brady Bunch Marathon.
Kim: You at least defrosted the turkey, Right?
Adam: Yeah.
*Kim walks in the kitchen and sees the turkey on the table. She then touches it.*
Kim: ADAM....THIS TURKEY IS STILL FROZEN. YOU SAID YOU DEFROSTED IT!
Adam: I Did...I Took it out about 20 minutes ago and Turned the heater up.
Kim: Adam, Its gonna take hours to cook this turkey....Hours we DONT HAVE!
Adam: ....Is that a problem?
*Kim smacks Adam in the forehead.*
Kim: YES ITS A PROBLEM!
Adam: Dont worry about it, Kim...Ill get us a Turkey.
Kim: How?
Adam: Well, Its gonna require some quick and rational thinking....And Luckily. Thats what i do best.
*Mr. Munson's apartment is shown as Mr. Munson is setting his turkey on the table. Theres then a knock on the door as he answers and sees Adam.*
Adam: MR. MUNSON, THE COUPLE IN APARTMENT 3B ARE FIGHTING....I THINK THEY JUST BROKE A WINDOW!
Mr. Munson:.....AGAIN?!
*Mr. Munson takes off his apron and throws it down, Then runs out the door. Adam then grabs The turkey off the table and runs towards the door, Looks around to each side and makes a run for it. Kim is then shown in the apartment when Adam walks back in with the turkey.*
Adam: I Got us a turkey!
Kim: Wow, That was fast. How'd you do it?
Adam: Quick and Rational Thinking, Kim....Quick and Rational Thinking.
*Kim grabs the turkey as Brad walks In.*
Brad: I'm ready to make the pie.
Adam: Pi...used to denote the number or quotient approximately expressing the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter; also, the quotient or the ratio itself. The value of the quotient pi, to eight decimal places, is 3.14159265. The quotient pi cannot be expressed as a root of an algebraic equation; and from this fact follows the impossibility of the quadrature of the circle by purely algebraic processes, or by the aid of a ruler and compass.
*Brad & Kim stare at Adam in shock and silence.*
Adam: ...I'm as surprised as you are.
*Jeff walks In.*
Jeff: Ok Guys, The Apartment is sanitary....But like i said, It wont last.
*Jeff walks over and covers the couch in plastic wrapping.*
Kim:....I'm gonna go make the stuffing now.
Brad & Adam: STUFFING!
Kim: DONT START!
*Kim walks off.*
Brad: Guess ill start on the pie.
*Brad walks off.*
Adam: And i shall watch the Parade.
*Adam goes and sits down on the couch, Then turns the TV On with the remote When theres a knock at the door. Adam Looks over at Brad, Kim & Jeff all hard at work.*
Adam: SOMEBODY GONNA GET THAT?...........*Sighs* Fine.
*Adam walks over and answers the door and sees His parents and brother.*
Adam: Oh....Hi....You guys are early.
Michael: Well, We just wanted to get an early start so we could spend some quality time with you.
*Kim Walks Over.*
Kim: Hi Mr. And Mrs. Collins
Julia: Kim, Right?
Kim: Yeah.
Julia: Adam's told us alot about you.
Michael: Yeah....ALOT.
Kim: And you must be Matt.
Matt: SINGLE And Looking, Matt!
Julia: Thats enough, Matt. Shes your brother's girlfriend.
Kim: What?
Adam: *Nervous Laughter* Ohhh You know Mom's and their imaginations.
Julia: But you told us...
Adam: Told you to show up at 11, Not 10, 11!
Jeff: Hi Mr. And Mrs. Collins.
Michael: Hi, Jeff.
Adam: Jeff! Why dont you show my parents and Matt our room?
Jeff: Why?
Adam: I Dunno...Just cause.......JUST DO IT!
Jeff: Ok. Right this way.
*Jeff Takes the Collins on a tour of the Apartment.*
Kim: Whats this about me being your girlfriend?
Adam: Uhhhh...I Plead the 6th.
Kim: The right to a speedy trial?
Adam:.....Yes.
*Kim Laughs and takes a bite off one of the dinner rolls, Then begins to choke.*
Kim: *Choking* ADAM.....*Starts Coughing*
Adam: Are you like...Catching a cold or something?
*Kim starts choking harder and points at her neck.*
Adam: *Laughs* Well Kim, I'm flattered...But nows not the time for hankay pankay.
*Kim angrily grabs Adam by the shirt.*
Kim: I'M *Coughs* CHOKING... YOU... IDIOT
Adam: Ohhhhh.....OH!
*Adam gets behind Kim and starts doing the heimlich maneuver when the front door swings open and a large man walks In.*
Large Man: WHAT THE?...
Kim: *Coughs Out Piece of Dinner Roll* DADDY!
*Kim runs over and hugs her Dad. Her Dad then walks over to Adam.*
Kim's Dad: What were you doing to my little girl?
Adam: Saving her life.....Sir.
Kim's Dad: If i wanted to....I Could pop your head like a grape.
Adam:........Mommy.....
Kim: *Laughs* Oh stop it, Daddy!
*Adam extends his hand and Kim's Dad reluctantly shakes it.*
Adam: I'm Adam Collins, Kim's roomate.
Kim's Dad: I'm Frank Stevens, Kim's Father....And Ex Soldier. I'm trained in multiple forms of armed combat....And because I'm A Cop Now, I Carry a big gun.
Adam:.....Please dont kill me, Sir.
*Frank Looks serious for a few seconds then starts to laugh.*
Frank: Dont worry about it, Kid.
*Kim smiles and walks away.*
Frank: *Fakely Smiling* Meet me out Back in an hour....Come alone.
*Frank Pats Adam on the back And walks off with a stern face as Adam Looks horrified. Theres then a knock on the door as Brad answers and sees his parents standing there.
Brad: Mom...Dad, Hi!
Brad's Mother: Hello, Brad.
Brad's Father: Nice Apartment....If you like that sort of thing.
Brad: Yes....Yes, I Do.
Brad's Father: Well...Then i suppose thats good.
Brad: I'm just gonna...Go finish the pie.
*Brad walks off.*
Brad's Mother: Carlos...I Thought we talked about this.
Carlos: I Cant help it, Maria...All Brad had to do was ask for more money and we could have given it to him. He doesnt NEED To share a tiny apartment with 3 other people.
Maria: Our son is a Grown Man, Let him do what he wants to do.
Carlos: I Just want whats best for him. We both grew up in Neighborhoods far from perfect, I Promised myself that it would be different for my son.
Maria: Carlos, He lives in a good neighborhood with his friends.
Carlos: How long has he known these "Friends"? They moved in together the day they met...How ridiculous is that?
Maria: Carlos...
*Just then Jeff comes walking out wearing gloves and spraying sanitizer*
Jeff: Hi.
Carlos: Hello....Adam?
Jeff: Jeff.
Carlos: Nice to meet you, Jeff.
*Carlos extends his hand*
Jeff: I'd rather not shake hands while sanitizing things, If thats Ok.
Carlos: Perfectly Understandable.
*Jeff walks away.*
Carlos: A Weirdo....Our son lives with a weirdo.
Maria: Oh Carlos....Maybe the other 2 are a little more...Normal.
*Adam Walks up.*
Adam: Hi, You Brad's parents?
Maria: Yes we are...Are you Adam?
Adam: Thats what it says on my underwear...Well, Actually today it says Jeff. But dont tell him that....*Whispers* He hates it when i borrow his underwear.*
*Adam walks away.*
Carlos: Oh Yeah....Hes REAL Normal.
*Just then theres a knock on the door and Adam answers. Mr. Munson is shown on the other side.*
Mr. Munson: Mr. Collins.....Did you steal my turkey?
Adam: ......No.....
Mr. Munson: 3 Different tenants have told me they seen you running out of my apartment and down the hall like a madman with A Turkey.
Adam: No....That wasnt me....That was....Potsie.
Mr. Munson:....Yes.....Well.....Tell "Potsie" I Want my turkey back.
*Kim Walks Up.*
Kim: Tell you what, Mr. Munson...Why dont you just join us?
Mr. Munson: Oh No, I Couldnt...
Kim: Ok...
Mr. Munson: ...But I Will....Being its my turkey and all.
*Mr. Munson walks In and sits at the table. Just then Matt walks up to Kim.*
Matt: Hey Babe, If you ever decide to dump My Loser brother...Give me a call!
*Matt Winks and Points before walking away.*
Kim: Remind me again, Adam...Why do they think we're dating?
Adam: Cause.....And......The......
*Adam runs off. Brad is then shown taking his pie out of the oven as its burnt to a crisp.*
Jeff: Nice Looking pie there, Brad.
Brad: Shut Your Piehole, Jeff.
Jeff: I'd tell you to do the same, But the entire pie would turn to ashes.
*Everyone sits down at the table. Frank sits down next to Adam.*
Frank: Words getting around that you're dating my daughter...
Adam: Sir, I...
Frank: Remember when i told you to meet me out back and come alone?
Adam: Y...Yes.
Frank: Scratch that....You may need reinforcements.
*Adam Gulps*
Jeff: So do we eat now?
Kim: Your parents arent here yet...
Jeff: ......I Repeat, Do we eat now?
*Suddenly theres a knock on the door. Kim gets up and answers it as Jeff looks depressed. Kim opens it and a slobby looking couple is shown. The Man is wearing a clip on tie over a white t-shirt and some jeans as the Woman is wearing a cheap looking dress.*
Kim: Hi.
Man: Hello Darlin, I Dont know who ya are but if my son Aint spoken for ya, You're all mine!
*The Man starts laughing as the Woman elbows him and he stops.*
Woman: We're Jeff's Parents The Kimbles. I'm Mary, And this is My Husband Bob.
Kim: Ohhh, Nice to meet you. We were just about to eat.
Bob: Well then i guess we showed up just in time. *Yells Out Door* HEY PATRICK, GET YOUR BUTT IN HERE.
*A Young guy Wearing a dirty looking t-shirt and jeans walks In, Then walks up to Jeff.*
Patrick: LITTLE BRO!
Jeff: Patrick......Did you shower today?
Patrick: *Rolls Eyes* Nagging As Usual, Huh Jeff?
Jeff: No...I Just think it would be nice if you bathed for important events like this....Or at least once a week.
Patrick: Hey Hey...I Changed my shirt yesterday.
*All of the Kimbles find seats as Kim gets back in hers*
Kim: So...Who wants to say grace?
*Everyone Stays Silent*
Bob: Well i reckon i could.
Jeff: Dad.....NO!
Bob: Hush Up, Son...Its time to talk to the Man Upstairs.
*Everyone holds their hands together in prayors.*
Bob: Dear Lord...We are thankful for the food you set in front of us, The beautiful home here you have for our children, And the Beautiful girl livin with em.
Adam: AMEN!
*Frank gives Adam a dirty Look.*
Adam: I Mean....Amen.
Bob: Now Rubba Dub Dub, Lets eat some grub. Amen.
*Bob starts to dig in, As does everyone else. Later on everyone is shown saying their goodbyes.*
Michael: Well that was a great dinner, Kim. *Looks at Adam* Got yourself a fine woman there, Son.
*Kim Looks at Adam evily as Adam looks embarassed and gives a fake laugh.*
Julia: Maybe you two could come to our house next year.
Adam: *Quickly* Oh Yeah, That would be nice, Bye.
*Adam rushes his parents and Matt out.*
Kim: We are SO Gonna talk about this later, Adam...
*Kim walks off. Just then Frank walks up to Adam.*
Frank: I Have to get back to my hotel in a hurry, So what i wanted to do will have to wait....But next time i'm here, I Suggest you be ready.
Adam: ....You are a very frightening man, Sir.
Frank: *Smiles* Yes...Yes I Am.
*Frank walks out as Adam Looks relieved. Brad's parents then go up to him.*
Carlos: Well Brad, I Guess we'll see you at Christmas...
Brad: Dad...I Cant help but notice that you've been uncomfortable here all day. Whats the problem...As if i didnt already know.
Carlos: Son...I've worked very hard to give you and your Mother everything. Why Wont you accept it?
Brad: Because Dad....I'm not a kid anymore. I'm A Man, And i need to make it on my own.
Carlos: You realize all you have to do is ask, And i'll get you a penthouse and a Ferari.
*Adam Pops his head in.*
Adam: I'll Take It!
*Brad pushes Adam away.*
Brad: No Thanks, Dad...All i want from you is your company.
Carlos: I Think thats going a little overboard son, Although i could always make you President.
Brad: Not your COMPANY, Dad....Your Company...As in being together.
Carlos: Oh....
Brad: Sometimes i miss the times before we were rich, Dad. Remember when i was 7 years old and we took those fishing trips every year? Or when we would go to a Football game on Sundays? Ever since you've become big, You were always too busy.
Carlos: Son....I Had no idea.
Brad: Well...You do now.
Carlos:.....Tell you what, 2 Weeks from now lets go fishing....Just you and me.
Brad: Seriously?
Carlos: Yeah...We can take the Yacht.
Brad: Dad...
Carlos: Or...A Speed Boat.
Brad: *Smiles* Thanks, Dad.
*Brad hugs both of his parents before they walk out. Jeff is then shown talking with his family.*
Bob: Well Son, That Kim chick isnt just hot...She also makes one heck of a turkey. Puts your Mother's cooking to shame.
Mary: BOB!
Bob:...What?......What?
*Mary Hugs Jeff and Bob pats Jeff on the back before they walk out.*
Patrick: Oh, And Jeff...Sorry about the bathroom. *Whispers* I've Always had terrible aiming..
*Patrick walks out.*
Jeff:........THATS UNSANITARY!
*Jeff runs towards the bathroom.*
Mr. Munson: Well thanks for inviting me to dinner, Kids....Although I'm still not happy about my turkey being stolen.
Adam: Yeah....Dang That Potsie.
*Mr. Munson shakes his head and walks out. Kim, Adam & Brad then sit down on the couch exhausted.*
Brad: Thank God thats over...
Kim: You're telling me.
Adam: What do you say we go Visit THEM For Christmas?
Brad: Adam....Thst just about the smartest thing you've ever said....Aside from that...Pi Thing.
Adam: Pie?...What kind of pie?
*Brad & Kim stare Oddly at Adam as the episode ends.*
Adam Collins - Chad Doody
Brad Fulton - TF
Jeff Kimble - EFD
Kim Stevens - Brooke Anne Smith
Walter Munson - William Daniels
GUEST STARS
Michael Collins - Timothy Daly
Julia Collins - Erin Moran
Matt Collins - Jake Thomas
Carlos Fulton - Carlos Lacamara
Maria Fulton - Constance Marie
Bob Kimble - Blake Clark
Mary Kimble - Crystal Bernard
Patrick Kimble - Erik Von Detton
Frank Stevens - Dan Lauria
_____________________________________________________________________________________
*Adam, Kim & Jeff are shown sitting as Brad walks up.*
Brad: Ok guys, The arrangements have been made. All of our familys should be arriving the day after tommorow.
Jeff: I Gotta Admit, Adam....That was a great idea to invite all of our familys here for Thanksgiving.
Adam: Yeah, I Just figured....Why should we all have to go through the trouble of going back home....Make them come here.
Kim: Adam....Your Parents live like 10 miles away.
Adam: Yeah But Thats Like....A Million millograms in Canadian.
Brad: Milograms?...
Kim: Well my Father lives all the way in Kansas, So This is gonna be nice. I Havent even seen him since i moved here.
Brad: I'm still not so sure about all this, Myself.
Jeff: Whys That?
Brad: My Parents are rich...They're used to having fancy dinners on Thanksgiving that are made by caterers. I'm afraid they're gonna be extremely unimpressed by me living in a tiny apartment with 3 other people.
Adam: Dont worry, Brad. Once they meet us, I'm sure they'll LOVE Your living arrangements. I Dont wanna brag, But i make a PRETTY Good Impression on people.
Brad: Oh God......I GOTTA GO CALL THEM AND TELL THEM NOT TO COME.
*Brad runs off as Adam Looks confused*
(Themesong: "Different People" By No Doubt)
*Kim is shown in the kitchen when Brad Walks in with a bag of grocerys*
Brad: I Got the food. Cranberry Sauce, Dinner rolls, And about 5 pounds of stuffing.
Kim: 5 Pounds? We have alot of people coming, But i dont think we need THAT Much.
Brad: I Enjoy Stuffing.
Kim: But...
Brad: I REALLY Enjoy Stuffing...
Kim: O...K.
*Adam walks in.*
Adam: Hey Guys I...*Looks at Grocery Bag* STUFFING!
Brad: You Bet your life its stuffing, Fella!
Adam: Stuffing RULES!
Brad: The Only thing better than stuffing...Is Girls.
Adam: Dude, What about girls That bring you stuffing and cook it for you?
Brad: Now thats just heaven.
Kim: GUYS....ENOUGH ABOUT STUFFING!
Adam: *Shocked* But.....Its Stuffing.
*Jeff walks In.*
Jeff: Ohhh Stuffing...
Kim: SHUT UP!
Jeff: .....*Looks at Adam* Whats her problem?
Adam: Shes A Stuffing Hater.
Kim: I Am NOT A Stuffing hater.....I'm just tired of hearing about stuffing. Now since you're all here, I Wanted to give you your assignments.
Adam: No Way, Kim...School is OUT For Thanksgiving time...I Refuse to work in any way And theres no way you can make me.
Kim: *Sad Face* Please...
Adam: *Smiles Like An Idiot* Ok!
Kim: Brad, I Need you to make the pie.
Brad: Uhhh....I've never done that before. We had Servants for that back home.
Kim: Its easy, Brad. Just follow the recipe in my cookbook. Jeff....I Need you to tidy up the house before our families get here.
Jeff: Thats what i do best....But i gotta warn ya, My family will make sure it doesnt stay clean for long. Buncha slobs........On second thought, Do they REALLY Have to come here?
Kim: Yes, Now clean up. Adam, I Need you to...
Adam: Give you a backrub?
Kim: No...
Adam: Let you give me a backrub?
Kim: No...
Adam: *Shocked* Dont tell me you want me to be a part of your sick spawning Ritual so that we can engage in meaningless love making for the sole reason of allowing you to have children before tossing me away like an old magazine?
Kim: N...
Adam: Cause I'd be fine with that.
Kim:.......No, I Just want you to defrost the turkey. That is your ONE Job...It is fairly easy.
Adam: Oh.....Ok.
Kim: Now lets get to it, Tommorows Thanksgiving!
*Adam, Brad & Jeff walk away as Kim smiles.*
Kim: Nothing can go wrong!
*The next day Kim is shown walking into the living room and sees Adam sleeping on the couch covered in potato chip crumbs with the TV On.*
Kim: ADAM!
Adam: *Wakes Up* Whaa...Whats the matter?
Kim: Our parents are arriving in about an hour! Why did you sleep on the couch anyway?
Adam: Brady Bunch Marathon.
Kim: You at least defrosted the turkey, Right?
Adam: Yeah.
*Kim walks in the kitchen and sees the turkey on the table. She then touches it.*
Kim: ADAM....THIS TURKEY IS STILL FROZEN. YOU SAID YOU DEFROSTED IT!
Adam: I Did...I Took it out about 20 minutes ago and Turned the heater up.
Kim: Adam, Its gonna take hours to cook this turkey....Hours we DONT HAVE!
Adam: ....Is that a problem?
*Kim smacks Adam in the forehead.*
Kim: YES ITS A PROBLEM!
Adam: Dont worry about it, Kim...Ill get us a Turkey.
Kim: How?
Adam: Well, Its gonna require some quick and rational thinking....And Luckily. Thats what i do best.
*Mr. Munson's apartment is shown as Mr. Munson is setting his turkey on the table. Theres then a knock on the door as he answers and sees Adam.*
Adam: MR. MUNSON, THE COUPLE IN APARTMENT 3B ARE FIGHTING....I THINK THEY JUST BROKE A WINDOW!
Mr. Munson:.....AGAIN?!
*Mr. Munson takes off his apron and throws it down, Then runs out the door. Adam then grabs The turkey off the table and runs towards the door, Looks around to each side and makes a run for it. Kim is then shown in the apartment when Adam walks back in with the turkey.*
Adam: I Got us a turkey!
Kim: Wow, That was fast. How'd you do it?
Adam: Quick and Rational Thinking, Kim....Quick and Rational Thinking.
*Kim grabs the turkey as Brad walks In.*
Brad: I'm ready to make the pie.
Adam: Pi...used to denote the number or quotient approximately expressing the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter; also, the quotient or the ratio itself. The value of the quotient pi, to eight decimal places, is 3.14159265. The quotient pi cannot be expressed as a root of an algebraic equation; and from this fact follows the impossibility of the quadrature of the circle by purely algebraic processes, or by the aid of a ruler and compass.
*Brad & Kim stare at Adam in shock and silence.*
Adam: ...I'm as surprised as you are.
*Jeff walks In.*
Jeff: Ok Guys, The Apartment is sanitary....But like i said, It wont last.
*Jeff walks over and covers the couch in plastic wrapping.*
Kim:....I'm gonna go make the stuffing now.
Brad & Adam: STUFFING!
Kim: DONT START!
*Kim walks off.*
Brad: Guess ill start on the pie.
*Brad walks off.*
Adam: And i shall watch the Parade.
*Adam goes and sits down on the couch, Then turns the TV On with the remote When theres a knock at the door. Adam Looks over at Brad, Kim & Jeff all hard at work.*
Adam: SOMEBODY GONNA GET THAT?...........*Sighs* Fine.
*Adam walks over and answers the door and sees His parents and brother.*
Adam: Oh....Hi....You guys are early.
Michael: Well, We just wanted to get an early start so we could spend some quality time with you.
*Kim Walks Over.*
Kim: Hi Mr. And Mrs. Collins
Julia: Kim, Right?
Kim: Yeah.
Julia: Adam's told us alot about you.
Michael: Yeah....ALOT.
Kim: And you must be Matt.
Matt: SINGLE And Looking, Matt!
Julia: Thats enough, Matt. Shes your brother's girlfriend.
Kim: What?
Adam: *Nervous Laughter* Ohhh You know Mom's and their imaginations.
Julia: But you told us...
Adam: Told you to show up at 11, Not 10, 11!
Jeff: Hi Mr. And Mrs. Collins.
Michael: Hi, Jeff.
Adam: Jeff! Why dont you show my parents and Matt our room?
Jeff: Why?
Adam: I Dunno...Just cause.......JUST DO IT!
Jeff: Ok. Right this way.
*Jeff Takes the Collins on a tour of the Apartment.*
Kim: Whats this about me being your girlfriend?
Adam: Uhhhh...I Plead the 6th.
Kim: The right to a speedy trial?
Adam:.....Yes.
*Kim Laughs and takes a bite off one of the dinner rolls, Then begins to choke.*
Kim: *Choking* ADAM.....*Starts Coughing*
Adam: Are you like...Catching a cold or something?
*Kim starts choking harder and points at her neck.*
Adam: *Laughs* Well Kim, I'm flattered...But nows not the time for hankay pankay.
*Kim angrily grabs Adam by the shirt.*
Kim: I'M *Coughs* CHOKING... YOU... IDIOT
Adam: Ohhhhh.....OH!
*Adam gets behind Kim and starts doing the heimlich maneuver when the front door swings open and a large man walks In.*
Large Man: WHAT THE?...
Kim: *Coughs Out Piece of Dinner Roll* DADDY!
*Kim runs over and hugs her Dad. Her Dad then walks over to Adam.*
Kim's Dad: What were you doing to my little girl?
Adam: Saving her life.....Sir.
Kim's Dad: If i wanted to....I Could pop your head like a grape.
Adam:........Mommy.....
Kim: *Laughs* Oh stop it, Daddy!
*Adam extends his hand and Kim's Dad reluctantly shakes it.*
Adam: I'm Adam Collins, Kim's roomate.
Kim's Dad: I'm Frank Stevens, Kim's Father....And Ex Soldier. I'm trained in multiple forms of armed combat....And because I'm A Cop Now, I Carry a big gun.
Adam:.....Please dont kill me, Sir.
*Frank Looks serious for a few seconds then starts to laugh.*
Frank: Dont worry about it, Kid.
*Kim smiles and walks away.*
Frank: *Fakely Smiling* Meet me out Back in an hour....Come alone.
*Frank Pats Adam on the back And walks off with a stern face as Adam Looks horrified. Theres then a knock on the door as Brad answers and sees his parents standing there.
Brad: Mom...Dad, Hi!
Brad's Mother: Hello, Brad.
Brad's Father: Nice Apartment....If you like that sort of thing.
Brad: Yes....Yes, I Do.
Brad's Father: Well...Then i suppose thats good.
Brad: I'm just gonna...Go finish the pie.
*Brad walks off.*
Brad's Mother: Carlos...I Thought we talked about this.
Carlos: I Cant help it, Maria...All Brad had to do was ask for more money and we could have given it to him. He doesnt NEED To share a tiny apartment with 3 other people.
Maria: Our son is a Grown Man, Let him do what he wants to do.
Carlos: I Just want whats best for him. We both grew up in Neighborhoods far from perfect, I Promised myself that it would be different for my son.
Maria: Carlos, He lives in a good neighborhood with his friends.
Carlos: How long has he known these "Friends"? They moved in together the day they met...How ridiculous is that?
Maria: Carlos...
*Just then Jeff comes walking out wearing gloves and spraying sanitizer*
Jeff: Hi.
Carlos: Hello....Adam?
Jeff: Jeff.
Carlos: Nice to meet you, Jeff.
*Carlos extends his hand*
Jeff: I'd rather not shake hands while sanitizing things, If thats Ok.
Carlos: Perfectly Understandable.
*Jeff walks away.*
Carlos: A Weirdo....Our son lives with a weirdo.
Maria: Oh Carlos....Maybe the other 2 are a little more...Normal.
*Adam Walks up.*
Adam: Hi, You Brad's parents?
Maria: Yes we are...Are you Adam?
Adam: Thats what it says on my underwear...Well, Actually today it says Jeff. But dont tell him that....*Whispers* He hates it when i borrow his underwear.*
*Adam walks away.*
Carlos: Oh Yeah....Hes REAL Normal.
*Just then theres a knock on the door and Adam answers. Mr. Munson is shown on the other side.*
Mr. Munson: Mr. Collins.....Did you steal my turkey?
Adam: ......No.....
Mr. Munson: 3 Different tenants have told me they seen you running out of my apartment and down the hall like a madman with A Turkey.
Adam: No....That wasnt me....That was....Potsie.
Mr. Munson:....Yes.....Well.....Tell "Potsie" I Want my turkey back.
*Kim Walks Up.*
Kim: Tell you what, Mr. Munson...Why dont you just join us?
Mr. Munson: Oh No, I Couldnt...
Kim: Ok...
Mr. Munson: ...But I Will....Being its my turkey and all.
*Mr. Munson walks In and sits at the table. Just then Matt walks up to Kim.*
Matt: Hey Babe, If you ever decide to dump My Loser brother...Give me a call!
*Matt Winks and Points before walking away.*
Kim: Remind me again, Adam...Why do they think we're dating?
Adam: Cause.....And......The......
*Adam runs off. Brad is then shown taking his pie out of the oven as its burnt to a crisp.*
Jeff: Nice Looking pie there, Brad.
Brad: Shut Your Piehole, Jeff.
Jeff: I'd tell you to do the same, But the entire pie would turn to ashes.
*Everyone sits down at the table. Frank sits down next to Adam.*
Frank: Words getting around that you're dating my daughter...
Adam: Sir, I...
Frank: Remember when i told you to meet me out back and come alone?
Adam: Y...Yes.
Frank: Scratch that....You may need reinforcements.
*Adam Gulps*
Jeff: So do we eat now?
Kim: Your parents arent here yet...
Jeff: ......I Repeat, Do we eat now?
*Suddenly theres a knock on the door. Kim gets up and answers it as Jeff looks depressed. Kim opens it and a slobby looking couple is shown. The Man is wearing a clip on tie over a white t-shirt and some jeans as the Woman is wearing a cheap looking dress.*
Kim: Hi.
Man: Hello Darlin, I Dont know who ya are but if my son Aint spoken for ya, You're all mine!
*The Man starts laughing as the Woman elbows him and he stops.*
Woman: We're Jeff's Parents The Kimbles. I'm Mary, And this is My Husband Bob.
Kim: Ohhh, Nice to meet you. We were just about to eat.
Bob: Well then i guess we showed up just in time. *Yells Out Door* HEY PATRICK, GET YOUR BUTT IN HERE.
*A Young guy Wearing a dirty looking t-shirt and jeans walks In, Then walks up to Jeff.*
Patrick: LITTLE BRO!
Jeff: Patrick......Did you shower today?
Patrick: *Rolls Eyes* Nagging As Usual, Huh Jeff?
Jeff: No...I Just think it would be nice if you bathed for important events like this....Or at least once a week.
Patrick: Hey Hey...I Changed my shirt yesterday.
*All of the Kimbles find seats as Kim gets back in hers*
Kim: So...Who wants to say grace?
*Everyone Stays Silent*
Bob: Well i reckon i could.
Jeff: Dad.....NO!
Bob: Hush Up, Son...Its time to talk to the Man Upstairs.
*Everyone holds their hands together in prayors.*
Bob: Dear Lord...We are thankful for the food you set in front of us, The beautiful home here you have for our children, And the Beautiful girl livin with em.
Adam: AMEN!
*Frank gives Adam a dirty Look.*
Adam: I Mean....Amen.
Bob: Now Rubba Dub Dub, Lets eat some grub. Amen.
*Bob starts to dig in, As does everyone else. Later on everyone is shown saying their goodbyes.*
Michael: Well that was a great dinner, Kim. *Looks at Adam* Got yourself a fine woman there, Son.
*Kim Looks at Adam evily as Adam looks embarassed and gives a fake laugh.*
Julia: Maybe you two could come to our house next year.
Adam: *Quickly* Oh Yeah, That would be nice, Bye.
*Adam rushes his parents and Matt out.*
Kim: We are SO Gonna talk about this later, Adam...
*Kim walks off. Just then Frank walks up to Adam.*
Frank: I Have to get back to my hotel in a hurry, So what i wanted to do will have to wait....But next time i'm here, I Suggest you be ready.
Adam: ....You are a very frightening man, Sir.
Frank: *Smiles* Yes...Yes I Am.
*Frank walks out as Adam Looks relieved. Brad's parents then go up to him.*
Carlos: Well Brad, I Guess we'll see you at Christmas...
Brad: Dad...I Cant help but notice that you've been uncomfortable here all day. Whats the problem...As if i didnt already know.
Carlos: Son...I've worked very hard to give you and your Mother everything. Why Wont you accept it?
Brad: Because Dad....I'm not a kid anymore. I'm A Man, And i need to make it on my own.
Carlos: You realize all you have to do is ask, And i'll get you a penthouse and a Ferari.
*Adam Pops his head in.*
Adam: I'll Take It!
*Brad pushes Adam away.*
Brad: No Thanks, Dad...All i want from you is your company.
Carlos: I Think thats going a little overboard son, Although i could always make you President.
Brad: Not your COMPANY, Dad....Your Company...As in being together.
Carlos: Oh....
Brad: Sometimes i miss the times before we were rich, Dad. Remember when i was 7 years old and we took those fishing trips every year? Or when we would go to a Football game on Sundays? Ever since you've become big, You were always too busy.
Carlos: Son....I Had no idea.
Brad: Well...You do now.
Carlos:.....Tell you what, 2 Weeks from now lets go fishing....Just you and me.
Brad: Seriously?
Carlos: Yeah...We can take the Yacht.
Brad: Dad...
Carlos: Or...A Speed Boat.
Brad: *Smiles* Thanks, Dad.
*Brad hugs both of his parents before they walk out. Jeff is then shown talking with his family.*
Bob: Well Son, That Kim chick isnt just hot...She also makes one heck of a turkey. Puts your Mother's cooking to shame.
Mary: BOB!
Bob:...What?......What?
*Mary Hugs Jeff and Bob pats Jeff on the back before they walk out.*
Patrick: Oh, And Jeff...Sorry about the bathroom. *Whispers* I've Always had terrible aiming..
*Patrick walks out.*
Jeff:........THATS UNSANITARY!
*Jeff runs towards the bathroom.*
Mr. Munson: Well thanks for inviting me to dinner, Kids....Although I'm still not happy about my turkey being stolen.
Adam: Yeah....Dang That Potsie.
*Mr. Munson shakes his head and walks out. Kim, Adam & Brad then sit down on the couch exhausted.*
Brad: Thank God thats over...
Kim: You're telling me.
Adam: What do you say we go Visit THEM For Christmas?
Brad: Adam....Thst just about the smartest thing you've ever said....Aside from that...Pi Thing.
Adam: Pie?...What kind of pie?
*Brad & Kim stare Oddly at Adam as the episode ends.*