When Dating Elaine

[sinatrastar]

When Dating Elaine, you should avoid these things to keep her happy:

1. Wearing fur



Let's see what kind of list we can get going based on Elaine's various pet peeves and dislikes.

[Elaine Benes]

2. Smoking

[dlemond]

umm.

Wearing a toupee.

[Elaine Benes]

4 Don't take "it" out on the first date

[sinatrastar]

5. Taking an anti-abortion/pro-life stance.

[Maestro]

When Dating Elaine, you should avoid these things to keep her happy:

6. Being a Desperado and not sharing your song aka the Brett.

7. Tanlge designer clothes as date bait aka the Craig.

8. Get your breakfast treats from a dumpster aka the Got No Green Lantern aka the Glen aka the Box Car Willie.

9. Get so hot & heavy you can't play your riffs aka the John Germaine.

10. Bring her a matteress with out complementing her weight aka the Hal Kitzmiller.

11. Have the same name as a serial killer aka the Joel Rifkin.

12. Talk to close or be obsessed with your friend's parents aka the Close Talker aka the Aaron.

13. Be against abortion aka the Carl aka the Moving Guy.

14. Be a fake bullfighter aka the Edward Carocio.

15. Be a re-gifter aka the Whately.

16. Be a "beard' and not switch teams aka the Robert (not that there's anything wrong with that).

17. Not knowing if your black or white aka the Darryl.

18. Shave your head, then go bald aka the Future Guy aka the Kurt.

19. Being not spongeworthy, not have good blood test or not shave your side burns aka the Billy.

20. Not watch the 3rd base coach aka the Keith.

21. Fail your Doctor's test exam aka the Ben.

22. Fall off your phsyco meds or post 1000 close up pictures of her on your walls aka the Crazy Joe.

23. Be a Svenjolly aka the Doc Reston.

24. Leave out exclamation points or get jealous of jujy-fruits aka the Jake Jarmel.

& finally...
25. Be like George.

If you do these things, you might have trouble with 'Lainey.

[Maestro]

26. Have a giant freak head ;)

[Dutabi84]

27. Have long sideburns

28. Also have a dirty bathtub, both aka the Spongeworthy guy.

[sinatrastar]

Sounds like Maestro had a list prepared, "just in case". ;)

28. Reserving a hotel room with one bed (Dr. Tim Whatley, DDS)

[Maestro]

Sorry folks, kind of bogarted the topic :rolleyes:

That was just a fun one, hope it causes a grin or 2.
(just went thru an ep list to ID some boyfriends)

[Brian Damage]

29 tongue kiss with the glasumus and the pappilli

[sinatrastar]

31) Taking her to ARBY'S!!

[Brian Damage]

32 be a TV pitch man

[MillenniumMan831]

33. Forget "The Other"

[kadeliah]

34. ask people to give you five (high five) all the time!!

[Brian Damage]

35 talk about money with holes in it.

[sinatrastar]

36) Donating money to the Crackotowans in an attempt to impress her. (It doesnt work)

37) Using a 'move' that involves a knuckle ;)

[barwars]

Originally posted by sinatrastar
37) Using a 'move' that involves a knuckle ;)

you stole mine!

[TJL]

Don't be a face painter.

;)

[sinatrastar]

38) Painting your chest as well

[MillenniumMan831]

39) Talk about her big head.

[Brian Damage]

40) Own a cat

[sinatrastar]

41) eat like a slob after losing a bunch of weight. (The Junior Mint)

[Maestro]

42) let your relationship go from chatting pleasantries, to just hello, to little sort of nods of recognition, to nothing.

[Maestro]

43) let your rottweiller bite her in the leg

no bang bang, woof woof.

[Maestro]

44) Wear a denim vest with big metal buttons.

[Brian Damage]

45 Have relations with a millionairess' boyfriend

[Maestro]

avoid with Elaine:

46) Doing the Lay Down Sally if your lovemaking skills are sub par to lobster bisque.

[Brian Damage]

47) Taking care of a recovering drug addict.

[Maestro]

48) Ask her to set her alarm to wake you up in the AM.

[sinatrastar]

Originally posted by Brian Damage
45 Have relations with a millionairess' boyfriend
I dont get this one ;)

[Maestro]

Originally posted by sinatrastar
I dont get this one ;)
aka the Pintor/Peter is I think the reference.

[sinatrastar]

So when dating Elaine you should avoid having an affair with an heiress's boyfriend? :lol:

[Brian Damage]

I don't know what I did there :crazy:

[Brian Damage]

I guess you could say, Don't be engaged to her arch enemy.

[sinatrastar]

49. Have your parents meet her at a restaurant and claim its not a 'date'. (Todd Gaak)

50. Put the moves on another girl by quizzing her on Nixon's middle name. (Todd Gaak)

51. Crumple to the ground in pain like a little wuss after one of her patented "GET OUT" pushes to your chest. (Kevin aka the bizaro Jerry)

[Brian Damage]

52) Be poor and married at the same time